The end of seeking

Updated: Jan 30, 2019

We all seem to seek something.


You may be seeking for that perfect relationship, for that perfect home or just a happy life. You may have already achieved some of your dreams that you seek, but there is always more, isn't' there? Whenever we reach one of our goals, another one seems to come up. In our seeking for the perfect life, the goal post seems to be moving each time we achieve something.


The seeking energy is what drives us in life. Usually, a bit later in life, the seeking energy becomes more of a spiritual search as we realise none of the material things gives us lasting pleasure. The energy of seeking is the same, however, even if the seeking is more of spiritual type. It seems that we always seek.


This seeking appears to be based on the condition that we are never happy right now. There seems to be a constant lack, and this lack creates the seeking energy. This lack is the gap between you and your ultimate salvation. Whatever you do you seem always to be just a little away from the goal, and the gap appears to remain.

The truth is that with our mind we can never fulfil the feeling of lack.


Like my teachers Abdy says:

Anything that starts with a search is fulfilling a lack

This feeling of lack creates suffering which is the core of the current human experience. We all suffer from something. It might be a physical illness, lack of money, lack of sufficient accommodation, lack of love or lack of really anything. And many of us never seem to be achieving what we want. Those who claim to have achieved what they want are often just in denial. This core drama leads us living a life of unfulfilled dreams, and may lead to dissatisfaction, disappointment and ultimately it may trigger depression.

The purpose of suffering is to awaken you to your diving nature as your true divine nature never suffers. In the world of God, there is no suffering, in the world of Ego, everyone is suffering.


As we live in a world of Ego, God is a very distant concept for many. In some countries people claim to be close to God, they pray a lot but still they remain seekers never really getting fulfilment. Some indeed do get closer to God, but most do not. Many religions are a form of control than a genuine connection with our creator.


The key to liberation from the chains of Ego is to realise that you are nothing. This nothingness seems challenging to the Ego as Ego's function is to be something. Nothingness is the only thing Ego does not want.


I recently had this experience where I realised that I am nothing. It freed me from all the ideas and concepts that any teacher had ever created. You see all ideas are like viruses controlling your mind to think in a certain way. There is no way to think, and this no-way is the way for liberation.


No-way is the liberation.

As Lisa Cairns says we are a movie character and we do not exist as we are just a field of love expressing itself. I would go even further. Ultimately we are “Nothing At All” in the world of Ego. Only this nothingness stops the loop of the ego, as within that loop something is always going on so that the Ego keeps identifying itself thought that something. It is a process of identifying yourself with your true self and not with your false self.


“I am no more” is one of the most potent mantras I have ever tried. Although nothing can be the way, certain things do help.


I am no more

Our ego wants to achieve things. Liberation is the opposite of achievement. Most new age teachings are about accomplishing things. Our Egos strive to get the next certification of being a healer of this and teacher of that. However, the only thing you certify is your Ego. It is challenging to find training which is about doing nothing or becoming nothing. Matrix Energetics was close to that as the goal in it was to master the art of doing nothing. Still, that training was way too complex, and now Richard Bartlett has evolved it into something even more complicated.


Nothingness is not pleasing to the masses, and it is not a good business to teach about nothing. It is a much better business to educate about complicated Yogic paths to liberation such as Kriya yoga, or difficult meditation paths such as TM meditation. If you are on any of those paths, get out as soon as you can. You have a higher chance of getting enlightened by lying down on your bed doing nothing than using any of those techniques. But if you lie down on the couch awaiting enlightenment, it is still a method, and most likely nothing will happen! Yes, it is a paradox, but nothingness is the key to liberation.


A friend of mine got awakened just by lying down on her bed for weeks. If you now try her technique, it would not work for you as you would have a desire for it to work. It worked for her as her desires ended and the lying down was the end of her desires. Lisa Cairns got awakened by eating banana chips. If you now go and buy boxes of banana chips all you get is not feeling that great by overeating. Eckhart Tolle got awakened when he stared at the mirror. It does not matter now how long you stare that mirror you would not get anywhere as the starting started with a desire. I recently realised that I am nothing when frying plantains on a hot plate. It is not about WHAT YOU DO; it is about suddenly recognising that you are not who you think you are.


This nothingness is about allowing, accepting and surrendering to what is. God is. Nothingness means that you recognise what is without trying to change it. I recently watched a semi-spiritual movie about God. It was a bit wishy-washy, but the core message was right. You cannot be the judge of anything. We tend to judge everything there is. We judge people we see on the street. We judge people based on how they speak or what they believe in. We experience judgement in life so that you would learn not to judge. All the people on this planet demonstrate different aspects of God, and sure some people are more in the darkness than in the light. And this darkness makes them do “bad’ things. However, we cannot be the judge as whatever happens is exactly what needs to happen.


Learning not to judge anything is one of the crucial realisations on the journey to get closer to God.


I had a dream recently where I saw how our thoughts impact the experience we have every day in our lives. Outside our corrupted thoughts is the real, unaltered spirit of ourselves. This spirit, however, is expressing itself through our corrupted thought forms and this then impacts the manifestation that we call life. If we have "bad" experiences in our life those are just a reflection of our corruption. Life is corrupt as our thoughts are corrupt. I wish people would understand and see how much their thoughts shape their daily experience in life. The less you think, the better. The less you become, the better. It is not about learning; it is about un-learning, unbecoming. It is about getting to know who you truly are and once you get that, the light shines through and changes everything. But most people have never experienced this or have any idea what I am even talking about.


Like in the first Matrix movie, once Neo sees the Oracle, she points to the sign “Temet Nosce“ which she explains means Know Thyself. When I was younger, I realised that I did not know who I was. It was only later in my life when I started to know who I am. This process, Know Thyself, is the ancient teaching of the Mysteries. That we awaken to the truth that we are not our bodies, that our bodies have a beginning and an end but that we are something much more that resides outside our body. This process is the mystery and the sacred secret, but it means nothing to know it, one has to experience it.


Our body is a temporary place where our consciousness dwells for this lifetime. We need to realise that the thoughts we form in our mind about our world are just temporary illusions. All of them. We are nothing means that we live in a dream. Our fleeting life is nothing at all, however behind that is the truth. We have to go through the "eye of the needle" to be able to reach the other side. We have to become nothing to be able to do that. Then we become everything. This process is very ambiguous and mystical.


“Stillness is your essential nature. What is stillness? The inner space or awareness in which the words on this page are being perceived and become thoughts. Without that awareness, there would be no perception, no thoughts, no world. You are that awareness, disguised as a person.” Eckhart Tolle

This stillness is the empty space which is what you are. When we realise that you start the process of releasing your spirit from the chains of the illusion (ego). This process is destructive, and it does mean that your delusions are shattered and you will experience pain if you hold onto on any aspect of this illusion. The more pain you have in your life this indicates that you hold onto this illusion.


Once we learn to drop our illusions, it does not mean that we stop doing stuff here in this 3D world. We still function and do the things that we need to do. However, things will undoubtedly change as you find it much harder to do things that are not aligned with your truth. This process often leads to dramatic life changes, which is precisely what you are supposed to go through as the next phase of the liberation process.

Awakening and liberation is the end of suffering and pain, but you may have to undergo suffering and pain when you release the attachments to the illusion. But once you get a taste on what’s on the other side, you will never go back. It is the disappearance of this world and the appearance of your true self which is the end of seeking.

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